Bree, as of late, has reminded me of the seagulls on Finding Nemo. You know, the ones that constantly squawk, "Mine, mine, mine, mine, mine..." I didn't think that I would have to know how to deal with a child who wouldn't share, or who thought that everything belonged to her. Kai Lan talks about "sharing" all of the time. Surely Bree would understand. Surely Bree wouldn't be THAT mean kid. Well, I was wrong and now I look like the World's biggest idiot. Buy a me t-shirt and coffee mug, because I deserve the title.I thought that since Bree was an only child (and I'm a stay-at-home-Mom), she wouldn't really be around other kids enough to be jerking toys out of their hands, and screaming "Mine!" This past Sunday, the Hubs and I had nursery duty at church. We realized pretty quickly that Bree was going to be trouble. She was a bully and just straight up mean to the other kids in the nursery. She would not let the other kids play with any of the toys in the room. Even if there was no possible way that she could play with all of the toys at one time, if any of the kids in the room even looked at a toy, Bree was screaming, "Mine!" and jerking the toy out of sight from them. I couldn't get Bree to listen to me, or reason with me. There was no, "Bree, why don't you play with this toy while they play with that one.", because she wouldn't hear of it. As far as she was concerned, every single toy in that nursery was hers and no one else's. She eventually got so bad, that the Hubs took her into another room.
And then...last night I picked Bree's Doodle Board up off of the floor and began drawing on it. She wasn't playing with it, nor was she anywhere near it. It was just lying there on the floor, being unused. As soon as Bree saw me pick it up, she started screaming, "Mine! Mine! Mine!" and when I told her that she had to share and that I wasn't going to give it to her...she screamed some more. She even threw a pillow at me. My 2 year old, sweet baby girl, was having a mental breakdown over a Doodle Board that she wasn't even using! She was screaming, and crying, and running to her room to slam the door, and then coming back out only to scream and cry some more. I couldn't reason with her. She was too upset to listen. So, I ignored her, and let her calm down. When I thought that she was calm enough, I asked her if she wanted to sit beside me and draw with me. Of course, she liked that idea. She hopped up on the couch beside me, and I then handed her the entire Doodle Board.
The point is, we have a real issue. It cannot be healthy for Bree to be this possessive over things. I realize that this is all normal, two year old behavior, but there has to be a way to tone it down. I mean, she resorts to violence if she isn't getting her away. In the nursery, she would push or shove. Last night, she threw a pillow at me. What in the world is wrong with me child? Any advice that you guys can give, please, by all means...give...
I'm desperate.
7 comments:
Do you know anyone that has a child Bree's age... maybe do a playdate with them once a week alternating houses... Also,some curches around here have MOPS, Mothers of Preschoolers... they are good groups to join.
My child is 14 and she is STILL stingy, in her own way...Drives me INSANE!
I have no advice - I'm not there yet.
I'm not there yet, but timeout works when I babysit. It hurts their feelings and teaches a lesson =)
Yikes, I don't know what to say on this one! So far my 3 1/2 year old hasn't shown that much of a possessive side but I know it's just a matter of time. If you figure it out, please do a post!
LOL!!!!
You tried to reason with her:)
Oh gosh...I'm sorry...Did I type this out loud??
You are doing the right things Sam. And she is going through a normal 2 yo phase. Stick to your guns though, about sharing, and hold your breath till this phase is over. (and a new one starts:)
i used to teach preschool, and when kids had a case of the 'mine mine mines!' and the parents asked for our advice, we always suggested setting up playdates with other kids.
try to remember that THIS TOO SHALL PASS :)
If the kids don't share it (or take turns-if they start wanting a toy just because someone else has it), they can kiss it goodbye. I give them one warning (Son/Daughter-you must remember to share/take turns, or that toy will be gone for the day) and if they don't comply the toy goes up in my closet and I bring it down after they go to bed.
The stingy stage is totally a normal part of being a toddler (or just a kid in general for that matter), and to some extent you just have to weather through it...for instance if you do take the toy away be prepared for a fit, especially the first few times...but I've had the kiss it goodbye policy since day one and it's worked very well for us.
Hang in there =)
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