Friday, April 09, 2010

One Busy Mama - A guest post

Happy Friday! As promised, Elizabeth of Confessions From a Working Mom is my guest poster for today! Actually, she is my first EVER guest poster, and I am super excited that she agreed to write for my blog today. Elizabeth is a super funny and talented blogger, and I hope you all enjoy this post! I'll be back on Monday with a full description of Parris Island & my Brother's USMC graduation...OH and of course I'll have pictures :)

Admit it...

We all think we're the busiest person we know.
Working moms think they're busier than stay at home moms...

"...what do you do all day at home?"
" can you not have time to cook/clean?"

Stay at home moms think they're busier than working moms...

"...I'm chasing kids all day, and you get 'me-time' when you're at work!"
"...I never sit down, and you get a cushy desk job!"

Of course, all moms think they're busier than women who don't have children, and married women think they're busier than single women...
...and on and on it goes...

Really, our version of busy is relative. Because, as the famous saying goes, you only have to die and pay taxes. Other than that, you are responsible for your own activities, responsibilities, and schedule. So if you're over-scheduled and over-committed and feel like you should be committed, you only have yourself to blame.
When I was younger, my mom was a stay-at-home mom. I didn't know until just this past year that this wasn't a choice she made-- rather, it was made for her as a stipulation of the adoption agency that placed me with my parents. (Interesting, huh? Is that still status quo in adoptions today, anybody know?) I used to wonder what she did all day... obviously, she cooked, cleaned, and acted as my personal chauffeur. But I also secretly believed that she spent a good deal of time watching cartoons, playing on my Nintendo, and eating bon-bons.
Over the past several weeks, I've had a lot of time off to spend with G at home. I chased her non-stop around the living room. I dragged her kicking and screaming out of not one, but TWO public libraries. I most definitely did not eat bon-bons. I gladly went back to work after the first of the year with the stark realization that I could not survive as a stay-at-home mom.
And that's when it hit me...
Some people might find my life as a career-driven mom exhausting. But for me, it works. I do a great job of managing my time; in fact, time management is always the "skill" I put at the very top of my resume. I thrive under pressure, and do my best work when the clock is ticking. If I'm not busy, I'm bored. But for others, they may find a busy life boring... repetitive... monotonous. I do the same thing every day, it's just that the parts are a little different.

Make sure you visit Elizabeth's blog to read more of her posts! If you don't know her, you have no idea what you're missing out on!

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Melissa said...

Nice "guest" post... I always find the SAHM vs. Working Mom debate interesting... I say, just do what works best for you and your family. Period.

B said...

I always find this debate interesting as well! Being a working mom that takes her baby to work sounds like a dream (and 95% of the time, it is!), but sometimes I feel like I'm playing both roles at the same time!

On a sidenote, I used to work at an adoption agency, and while I can only speak for Texas, it is not commonplace to require a parent to be home to adopt!

Confessions From A Working Mom said...

B, I just wanted to add that yes, it is unusual for adoption agencies to require mothers stay at home. That was 28 years ago, and I really do hope that times have changed and we are beyond that!!!

I never knew you worked at an adoption agency-- that's one of my dream jobs, as advocating for adoption is one of my passions!


Ian said...

I find the debate interesting as well. Tell me why you didn't include dads. Sexist much. psshhh....that's alright I see how it is.

I'll follow you anyway because Samantha threatened me if I didn't

Ian said...

D'OH am already following.

Alright...this is what I'll do. I'll unfollow


will follow again

Follower #666?

Holy's true...I AM THE DEVIL!!!!! LOL

Ally said...

I don't think I could ever afford to be a SAHM. Daycare is so expensive, it's a lose-lose situation. I was so desperate to figure out a way for us to afford having a child while we both worked that I thought about adoption. In NJ, if you adopt a baby or small child, they provide daycare until the child is six at a Dyfus-approved daycare center. My husband said no :(

Brandy said...

what a great guest post. I totally relate. I could never be a SAHM.

terri said...

Definitely an interesting debate. If you haven't read it, I recommend the book Mommy Wars: Stay-at-Home and Career Moms Face Off. There are some really great essays in there on the topic.

As for me, I just quit my job yesterday. I've been working from home for the past 5 months (my daughter is 8 months), which like B said, feels like you're playing both roles at the same time and is really not as great as it sounds once Hannah slowed up on the nursing and didn't need me as much. I was going to go back into the office 2 1/2 days a week and thought that sounded great, but since I've always hated my job anyway, I just quit. WHEW! What a relief!!! I'm going to try the SAHM thing for a bit and then try to pick up some freelancing work when I get bored.

Great guest post!

Powdered Toast Man said...

I hate when people say that they don't have any time. That just means they don't know how to schedule it properly.

I have to be doing things too, I feel useless when I just sit around.

Salt said...

Great guest post!! I love Elizabeth's blog!

I am not a mom yet, but I have no doubt that being a SAHM is one of the most difficult jobs that one can have! Personally, I'm going to have to work when I'm a mother because leaving my job would cut our income in half, so it will be interesting to see how I can juggle the two.