Wednesday, May 26, 2010

I'm Going to Burn Down This House!

One, hot Summer Day, my Mom and I were laying out by our pool in the back yard. Suddenly, we heard the back door slam and my Dad came storming out to the pool where we were. He picked up a vacant lawn chair, and chucked it across the yard, his face full of rage.

My Mom and I looked at each other, not really sure what was going on or why he was angry, but we both had the hint of a smirk across our face. To see a lawn chair fly across the yard was possibly the funniest thing we had seen in a while. Nevertheless, my Mom ventured to ask my Dad what was wrong with him.

My Dad replied, "I was hungry, so I went to the kitchen to make myself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. When I went to scoop me out some peanut butter the jar was empty! Nothing! Nothing left! WHO PUTS AN EMPTY JAR OF PEANUT BUTTER BACK INTO THE CABINET?!"

My Mom and I lost it. We nearly busted our guts from laughing so hard. If you could have heard how whiney his voice was, and how angry he was over peanut butter..you would have died too. Every time I think about my Dad throwing that lawn chair across the back yard, I laugh until I cry. It's one of the funniest stories I have to tell about my Dad. Don't worry, we're not violent people, it's just that throwing things is genetically etched into the part of our brain that triggers anger.

Anyway, I said all of that to tell you about this story I read earlier today. I nearly peed my pants from laughing so hard. Click here to read the story, and then come back and tell me if you peed your pants. If you didn't think it was funny at all...what's wrong with you?!

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14 comments:

Salt said...

HAAAAAA!!!!. The title of the story alone almost made me pee my pants!!! I've heard of anger management issues, but that takes it to a whole different extreme that I never knew to be possible.

Thanks for this!

Melissa said...

Well that guy just sounds like a real winner!

As to your dad - I think he over-reacted just a tad. I could honestly see myself getting irked and mad about something like that, although I don't think I would throw a chair over it.

Jenna said...

Holy crap. What's wrong with people!? That's hilarious. Poor woman..how did she live so long with a crazy?

Your story about your dad was hilarious!!

Shell said...

LOL @ being that upset over pb!

Off to check out that link.

MommyLisa said...

Didn't make me laugh really, the burning house one...something about drunk rednecks is not funny to me. - but your story was funny!

Katherine said...

Tequila....he must have been drinking tequila. Makes a person crazy!

Cari said...

The burned down house wasn't funny...I feel bad for her :( Your's was hilarious though!

mamma b said...

I still like your dads throwing the chair episode. That is a story I'm sure you'll never let him forget.

Joe Cap said...

I have to tell you...I have done some very odd things in my dim dark youth when something got me upset...but nothing quite tossing home furnishings through the air...OR burning down the house!

Brandy@YDK said...

I like to throw shoes. I get it. I'm a thrower

Powdered Toast Man said...

That story was funny but I liked urs better. I would get possed about no pb too. I would throw a garden gnome.

B said...

Thank you for this! I haven't laughed that much in a while!

Ally said...

can i tell you that my hubs does that crap all of the time! it drives me nuts!

FourthGradeNothing.com

MWalker said...

Sometimes a good throw makes it all better.

Feel super sorry for the man's wife. And that is why one should avoid alcohol, in my opinion. Make you C.R.A.Z.Y. sometimes.